Hi!!
My name is Sophia, I'm a 24 year old New York native with no driver's license and a bad case of wanderlust. I moved to Los Angeles about a year ago without fully realising the importance and necessity of a vehicle in this not so tiny town. I've been "going metro" for almost 12 months, and so far it's given me nothing but a bucket full of stories for the grandchildren. I was on my way to meet a friend tonight in Downtown LA, when I decided that I needed to start sharing my stories with the world.. And if nobody ends up reading this, at least it will be good therapy after a hair-pulling-5 hour-6 bus journey just to go to the grocery store!
I wish I had written down some of my earlier bus experiences, like the one time I saw a leprechaun talking to a bear in a tutu.. Or the time a man proved his flexibility to me on the way to Santa Monica by doing leg lifts, bends and stretches in the aisle. But that is why I'm starting this now!
In New York I took the subways and buses nearly everyday, and there were always noteworthy characters..but there's something special about the LA Metro riders... something is different about them... I'm not sure if it's because they seem a little more depraved? Or perhaps it's because many of them seem to have crawled out of the sewers in search of their nightly meal of flesh and blood! No, I kid Los Angeles bus riders... sort of. I mean, I'm one of them! (But that's not saying much, is it?)
Tonight's ride wasn't particularly enthralling, there were only a few key characters I took special note of:
1. The Multi-Stop Magician - This guy and his lady got on the bus right after I did and they sat and chatted for quite a few stops until he got off leaving his lady behind. I wouldn't have paid too much attention except for the fact that several stops later the very same guy re-entered the bus and sat right back down next to his lady and they continued their conversation as if no time had passed! What did this guy do, exit - sprint for 2 miles - stop for a tinkle - and get back on?? I was baffled and a little unnerved by this whole situation but no one else around me seemed to take any notice, so I left it alone.
2. The Smelly Seat Hopper - This guy was far less impressive than mr. magic up there, in fact this guy was just rude. He entered the bus pretty close to DT, somewhere on Temple and immediately the air thickened. I could smell him the moment he set foot inside... Now, it wasn't like he was homeless or anything, he was wearing fresh slacks and a button down shirt, it's just that he smelled REALLY bad! I'm not talking sweaty, or musky... I'm talking garbagey, more like SEWAGEY. I swear he rolled around in pig slop before getting on tonight, just to make us all suffer. And the worst part about him is that he couldn't stay in one spot! He started in the front of the bus, and hopped from seat to seat eventually making his way to the back, leaving his stench to linger in the noses of us innocents. I mean really guy... figure this thing out... It can't be good for the environment!
I ended up getting a ride home from my friend, so I have no return stories... But lucky for you I have many more bus rides in my future, and If Los Angeles stays just the way it is for me, I'll have many more stories ;)
See you next time!
*S*
No comments:
Post a Comment